So, Thank You...2015

Tonight, as I was putting Amelia to bed, she insistently declared “big girl” until I acknowledged that, yes, she is a big girl.  This is not an uncommon occurrence; “big girl” is one of many favorite phrases at my house right now.  But, tonight, I realized she’s right.  2015 has been the year of going from babyhood to toddlerhood for Amelia.  She’s running, climbing, yelling, using sentences, playing with toys, having simple conversations, and the list could go on.  I know that it’s completely cliché to say it, but on this New Year’s Eve, I’m reminded how quickly moments pass.  2015 has been full of all kinds of celebrations for our family;  a 4^th anniversary, a 31^st birthday, a 34^th birthday, a 7^th anniversabirthary and a first birthday.  We’ve travelled to Williamsburg, Gatlinburg, and Nashville to visit with family.  Adam spent time in Liberia; somehow, the only thing I did by myself was have thyroid surgery.  We’ve laughed, cried, fought, played, experienced good days, bad days and average days.  It’s been another year in this crazy life, a life that we are so lucky to share.

So, here I am, blanketed with nostalgia, joining everyone else out there thinking about the past year and the one to come while watching college football through confetti.  It’s the end of one year and the beginning of another.  We’re on the precipice of a new beginning.  Join me in the cheesiness of this wistfulness…jump on in, the water’s fine.

Since it’s the end of 2015 and not quite the beginning of 2016…yet, I’m going to look back for a moment.  2015, overall, you’ve been a good one.  I’m not saying you haven’t had your moments or tested my patience or even introduced me to situations that made me wish you away, but in this moment, I can honestly and confidently say, thank you, 2015.  That’s right, thank you.  I know it isn’t Friday night, but I’m going to thank you, a la Jimmy Fallon.

Thank you, 2015…for turning Amelia into a toddler, and all that entails.

Thank you, 2015…for giving us another giant monthly bill disguised as a house.

Thank you, 2015…for reminding me of the joys of anesthesia.

Thank you, 2015…for bringing Nike back to Tennessee and forcing some people to accept Smokey Grey.

Thank you, 2015…for talk shows and sketch comedy during election season, especially this one.

Thank you, 2015…for Amelia’s friends…and their names, that she recites at all hours of the night.

Thank you, 2015…for providing so many inanimate objects for Scout to save us from and bark at.

Thank you, 2015…for awakening the force.

Tomorrow, I’ll be ready to say, welcome, 2016 and bring it.  However, for tonight, I’ll leave it with thank you, 2015.

The Avengers, Thank You Notes and Mother’s Day

I am one of those people; I love superhero movies.  The capes, the absurdity, the illogical awesomeness; I’m a fan.  I like the super powers and the fun.  Adam and I were able to go see the new Avengers movie this week.  I could nearly fangirl out about it for a while, but that’s not what’s on my mind at the moment.  During this movie, we are given a glimpse into the personal lives of a few characters that hadn’t previously been given as much of the spotlight.   Surprisingly, one of the flashbacks touched on a theme I was not expecting. 

            This isn’t necessarily a spoiler, but I am going to mention a little bit that is revealed during the movie.  Heads up.  In the movie, we find out that Black Widow is unable to have children.  The disturbing cause of her infertility aside, this is a revelation that is obviously and understandably very painful for this character.   While I cannot pretend to understand what that would be like, my heart goes out to her. 

Every woman faces their own battles in the world of children.  None of the lives we choose are easy.  Days like Mother’s Day can be beautiful and as a mom celebrating her first Mother’s Day this weekend, I am especially attuned to that messy beauty this year.  I am also utterly lucky.  I have a beautiful, healthy, amazingly wonderful almost-one year old daughter that I absolutely adore and who I most certainly wanted. I couldn’t be more thankful for this part of my life…a part that I was able to choose.   

Mother’s Day doesn’t feel as beautiful or come as easily to everyone.  So, since it’s Friday, I’m going to follow Jimmy Fallon’s lead and throw out some thank you notes (you’ll have to hum the thank you note music in your head, but envision my with my pen raised and a serious look on my face for each note).

            Thank you, Moms (traditional and not), for wiping noses, giving hugs, listening, being chauffeurs, cooks, nurses, a million other things and best friends.  Thank you for doing the best you can and showing us how to become ourselves.  Thank you for being yourself and for not losing that as you learned how to be a mom.

            Thank you, Moms-to-be, whether that time is imminent or a long time coming.  Thank you for your patience, your hope and your love; love that’s already in place and waiting to be given out.

            Thank you, Moms who have lost children, for continuing to cherish the memories and to love your children.  Thank you for continuing to be a mom and for dealing with the awkward and bumbling attempts the rest of us make with you.

            Thank you, women who choose not to be mothers, for knowing yourselves.  Thank you for facing all of the when you’ll have children or why you won’t or any number of other prying questions that aren’t thought through.

            Thank you, reader, for knowing that I am probably leaving out someone but realizing that it’s unintentional.  Thank you for accepting my well meaning, albeit poorly worded intentions.

            Maybe next time I’ll gush about my first Mother’s Day or share my not-so-deep thoughts about another first “holiday” with Amelia, but for now, I’ll just say, to all of you, Happy Mother’s Day Eve Eve.