Maybe It's Much Too Early in the Game

One of the "perks" of being the parent of a toddler is that we are not out celebrating somewhere, watching something drop, as we count down the seconds to 2017.  I'm not sure whether that's a win for us or not.  The win that I can guarantee is that our two year old is already in bed.  So, we will fight the fight of all parents of young children (especially those who are 32 weeks pregnant) on New Year's - can we stay awake until midnight?  It's an exciting life, folks.  All of that aside, I wouldn't trade it for the world and I can promise that I am more than happy ringing in the new year with my favorite person.

Six years ago, on New Year's Eve, Adam proposed.  So, on this night, we do at least acknowledge our engage-a-versary.  This time around, we had a lovely steak dinner on our wedding china.  We taught Amelia how to do "cheers" and heard gleeful, toddler shouts of "happy New Year" throughout our romantic dinner.  Because of that significance for our family, New Year's is doubly meaningful.  You know how I love my special occasions.

Anyway, on this eve of a new year, I'm going to join the throes of people who are looking back and looking forward.  This is always a precipice and this year (just like all others) had it's ups and downs.  Yes, I will be the first to acknowledge that 2016 was tough at times; sometimes it felt unfair, sometimes we lost people, sometimes we had our hearts broken, sometimes we fought the good fight and still lost.  Even so, 2016 was also a year of smiles, of laughter, of growth, of new things, of anticipation and of life.

I thought about giving you the rundown of my favorite parts of 2016, or my resolutions for 2017 (which are, as always, many but not a little bit vague), or even just a countdown of moments to add to your countdown to the new year.  However, I decided against it.

Tonight, you do you.  Take the time to look back; think about your favorites of 2016.  Think about what made you smile, what told you to get out of bed in the morning, what made you look forward to the next day, what you learned, who you met, all of those things that make life, life.

Yes, you should also think about the things that were tough; that didn't work for you in 2016.  Think about your mistakes, think about the hurt, others that were hurt, what went wrong.  That's how we make 2017 better; that's how we move forward.

In the coming year, I hope that we will all move forward.  Looking back is important; we must know where we came from and how we got to where we are.  Moving forward doesn't mean we forget the past, but rather, that we learn from it.  Moving forward doesn't mean we give up on the things we aspire to change, but rather, that we evolve in our tactics, that we re-adjust our approach, that we concentrate on growing the right way.

My hope for 2017 is that it will be the year of love.  We should aspire to love so deeply, so radically, in such an all-encompassing way, that it cannot be ignored.  My hope for you in 2017 is that you are loved, you give love and you live love, whatever that looks like for you.

Right now, days pass quickly.  Our new addition's arrival is coming soon; my to-do list is a mile and a half long.  However, I am aspiring to cherish the moments we have as a family of three (plus Scout) and actively wait in happy anticipation for the changes in store in the next couple of months.  Currently, it's tough to see past the looming month of February.  Obviously, I have high hopes for you, 2017.

Happy New Year!

Little Full, Lotta Sap

Well, at least you can’t say I didn’t warn you.  During the season of Advent, my heart is always a little full, and there is never a shortage of sap.  I, like so many other people, do adore Christmas, not just the day, but the season.  Clark W. Griswold, Jr. may rival my love of the fun, old fashioned family Christmas, but I would never question that it’s the season to be merry (or is it Mary?) or waver in my dedication to have the hap-hap-happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny Kaye (in another of my all-time favorite movies). 

I’m not going to channel Linus VanPelt right now and give you rundown of what Christmas is all about.  That’s not what I’m trying to do today.  Today, I’m thinking of the waiting; the waiting, the anticipation, the preparation, all leading up to the celebration.  In the liturgical calendar, the church year begins on the first Sunday of Advent.  While Advent may fall at the end of our regular calendar year, for Christians, it is just the beginning.  Christmas is the beginning of the Easter story. Each week has a different focus; hope, peace, joy and love.  Then, the last focus is on the coming of Christ. 

To me, the anticipation makes the celebration sweeter.  Frederick Buechner said it better than I could in The Magnificent Defeat, “For outlandish creatures like us, on our way to a heart, a brain and courage, Bethlehem is not the end of our journey but only the beginning – not home but the place through which we must pass if we are ever to reach home at last.”

Those of you who know me (and let’s be honest, I doubt anyone who doesn’t know me is reading this blog), know that I absolutely love surprises.  I will go out of my way to avoid ruining a surprise.  I have never searched for Christmas presents; I have never shaken them, I have never tried to un-tape one corner to have an early look or made an attempt to convince my little brother to open them for me.   Along those same lines, if you know me, you also know that patience is not one of my virtues.  In certain situations, I may be able to feign patience and with some people it manifests itself in different ways; however, patience is most definitely not something that comes easily.  That being said, Advent is a different kind of waiting.  This is not a sit around, twiddle-your-thumbs, count the minutes kind of waiting. 

“Patience is waiting.  Not passively waiting.  That is laziness.  But to keep going when the going is hard and slow – that is patience.  The two most powerful warriors are patience and time.” –Leo Tolstoy

This is exactly that; an active waiting.  As we wait, we prepare.  We reflect.  We also wrap presents, decorate, go see Santa, foster the wonder of the season, bake cookies, travel all over the place, party, and watch every single Christmas movie/special/hallmark program that we can binge between Black Friday and Christmas Day.  Somewhere in there, we like to think that our priorities stay in line; that we do think of the less fortunate, that we are teaching our children that this season isn’t about gifts or money or cramming as much as possible into one month.  My “Psalty’s Christmas Calamity” record (yes, record), put it so nicely when I was a child; “Christmas is a time to love.”  Christmas is a time for hope, for peace, for joy and yes, for love. 

I do not mean that we should rebound and completely forego any of the wonder of Santa or gifts or any other fun, silly parts of Christmas.  I am not campaigning about semantics, to keep the “Christ” in “Christmas.”  There is no possible way that any of us could take him out.  I am not saying that Christians are being persecuted when someone says “Happy Holidays,” because there is nothing wrong with saying “Happy Holidays.”  In fact, “Happy Holidays” to all of you.  When we concentrate on those things, our priorities are just as skewed as if we take to the opposite extreme.

This year, seemingly more than others, we all need a little Christmas.  No matter where you fall on the political spectrum, it has been a bit of a tough year.  There have also been wildfires, deaths, hateful rhetoric, fear, infringements of rights, war, skewed priorities and so many other things that feel so heavy.  Maybe it’s the fact that baby girl #2 is making her presence more obvious, maybe it’s that a certain two-year-old is completely enchanted with the idea of Christmas this year, maybe it’s just the feeling of pulling all of the Christmas stuff out of the attic, or maybe it’s the combination of all of it, but I am feeling Christmas this year. 

The wonder of Christmas is raging in my house.  Our house is completely taken over with Christmas decorations from nativities to a real tree to an Advent wreath to a felt tree to a passed-down village to a cheesy, inflatable polar bear.   Amelia is at the age where it all feels new, magical, and marvelous.  It’s easy to see the magic when it’s reflected in her.  Ultimately, that wonder is infectious.

Through Christmas, we get to glimpse the love of God is an astounding way; through a refugee baby.  “And that is the wonder of all wonders, that God loves the lowly…God is not ashamed of the lowliness of human beings.  God marches right in.  He chooses people as his instruments and performs his wonders where one would least expect them.  God is near to lowliness; he loves the lost, the neglected, the unseemly, the excluded, the weak and broken.”  This quote from Dietrich Bonhoeffer in God is in the Manger: Reflections on Advent and Christmas, articulates another reason why Advent is so important this year.

There are so many who are justifiably afraid right now.  There are so many hurting, so many questioning, so many who have been betrayed by those they trusted.  Everyone out there needs hope, needs peace, needs joy, needs love.  We can help.  We can be safe.  We can be supportive.  We can fight to improve life, in all of its stages, for all people, even after birth. We can acknowledge and work through our prejudices.  We can live and be love, in a million different little and not-so-little ways.  After all, love really is all around.

At the very least, we could always follow in Buddy the Elf’s footsteps and spread Christmas cheer by singing loud for all to hear.  Ok, I’m off to make gingerbread houses and eat cookie dough and go ice-skating and maybe even hold hands…